When the Mirror Lies: A Female Bodybuilder’s Battle with Fitness Tech and Body Dysmorphia

This is a guest post by Asegul Hulus, author of Beyond the Metrics: The Psychological Impact of Fitness Technology on Self-Image and Social Anxiety

Six months have passed since I stashed my fitness watch in a drawer. Not because it broke, but because I did.

Being a dedicated female bodybuilder and self-proclaimed ‘gym rat’, I had assumed I was on the right track. I logged all workouts, steps taken and calories consumed. However, when the figures appeared more tangible than my reflection, I understood that something was amiss. In the mirror, my muscles appeared diminished, notwithstanding months of rigorous training and meticulous nutrition. Less strong. Insufficient.

The discrepancy between quantifiable advancement and subjective experience, a form of cognitive dissonance, affects a greater number of individuals engaged in exercise than commonly acknowledged. A recent study (Corazza et al., 2019) conducted across four European countries revealed that 11.7% of fitness club members exhibit indications of exercise addiction, with peak percentages of 20.9% in the Netherlands and 16.1% in the United Kingdom. An even more significant discovery: 38.5% were at risk of body dysmorphic disorder, with women accounting for 47.2% of those affected.

Female bodybuilders face distinct and exceptionally difficult challenges. While men pursue the muscular ideal of a ‘V-shape’, women face conflicting body standards: slender yet toned, strong but not ‘too masculine’ (Cuadrado et al., 2024). The fundamental aspect is that hormonal variations cause women to build muscle at a considerably slower rate than men. Our efforts are doubled for a fraction of the apparent outcomes, thus exposing us to the misrepresentations technology can exacerbate (Lafortuna et al., 2005).

When I knew the fitness watch wasn’t helping, I’d had enough. My anxiety was being fuelled by it. Each notification served as a form of judgement. Every piece of data contributed to a sense of deficiency. I came to a halt. I stopped using the fitness watch and returned to fundamental methods: monitoring my macronutrient intake to ensure I obtained sufficient protein, carbohydrates and fats from whole foods. No algorithms. No constant comparisons. 

Yet, the mirror continued to be my nemesis. Despite eating right and lifting heavy, I still saw smaller muscles, inadequate progress. Appearance anxiety is a spectrum of body image concerns that can manifest as conditions like body dysmorphic disorder, wherein perception is severely misaligned with reality (Cuadrado et al., 2024).

 My research for my up-coming book titled Beyond the Metrics: The Psychological Impact of Fitness Technology on Self-Image and Social Anxiety revealed disturbing patterns. In accordance with research such as Corazza et al (2019), it is observed that nearly 40% of gym users consume fitness supplements without medical consultation (95.5%), with a significant number utilising potentially hazardous products, including steroids (5.9%), diuretics (4.9%) and thyroid hormones (3%). Individuals demonstrating exercise addiction showed significantly higher scores on both exercise addiction and appearance anxiety scales. However, the underlying problem is more complex than the use of supplements.

 Continuous feedback from fitness technology, including metrics, tracking and social comparison features, can significantly change our approach to exercise and our perception of our bodies. According to Corazza et al. (2019), those displaying exercise addiction presented with significantly higher scores on the scales assessing exercise addiction and appearance anxiety. Integrating wearable technology further enhances data significance: users frequently interacting with social features like leaderboards or shared progress metrics exhibit increased body dissatisfaction and self-consciousness (Hulus et al., 2026).

 As a result, the data supported my findings: exercise addiction presented as the most significant predictor of supplement usage, and users were thrice as likely to use fitness products. Specifically for women, appearance anxiety and low self-esteem served as additional contributing elements (Corazza et al., 2019).

 Accepting a difficult reality was part of the recovery process: women naturally take more time to build muscle, and no fitness technology or application can alter our bodies. Actual advancement necessitates patience, which fitness technology, with its immediate data and continuous comparisons, actively hinders.

 Today, I focus on how my body feels: the weight I can move, the energy I have, the strength I’ve built. Nutritional figures retain their importance, although they do not dictate my self-perception. My muscles are growing, even when the mirror lies.

 At times, the most revolutionary act within fitness culture involves relying on the process instead of the metrics.

 References

• Corazza, O., Simonato, P., Demetrovics, Z., Mooney, R., van de Ven, K., Roman-Urrestarazu, A., Rácmolnár, L., De Luca, I., Cinosi, E., Santacroce, R., Marini, M., Wellsted, D., Sullivan, K., Bersani, G., & Martinotti, G. (2019). The emergence of exercise addiction, body dysmorphic disorder, and other image-related psychopathological correlates in fitness settings: A cross sectional study. PLOS ONE, 14(4), e0213060. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0213060
• Cuadrado, J., Laulan, P., Sentenac, C., Legigan, C., & Michel, G. (2024). ‘Bigger, stronger, sicker’: Integrative psychological assessment for muscle dysmorphia: Case studies of two young women bodybuilders. Psychiatry Research Case Reports, 3, 100212. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psycr.2024.100212
• Hulus, A., Hulus, E., & Doğan, E. (2026). Beyond the metrics: The psychological impact of fitness technology on self-image and social anxiety. Anthem Press.
• Lafortuna, C. L., Maffiuletti, N. A., Agosti, F., & Sartorio, A. (2005). Gender variations of body composition, muscle strength and power output in morbid obesity. International Journal of Obesity, 29(7), 833–841. https://doi.org/10.1038/sj.ijo.0802955